Sunday Selah ~ Striving and Resting

I'm a planner. I like to keep things under control. When planning  a large gathering for family, I set up a several lists that include a menu, shopping list(s) for each store, a cleaning list, a 'to-do' list, a guest list, and eventually I'll have a schedule for the 24 hours prior to the gathering. I'll admit that I am over the top and I make myself crazy and my family doesn't seem to like hanging out with me when I'm in this mode.

The reason I plan so much is because I have this crazy notion that I can control the outcome. I sincerely believe that if I have all my bases covered then nothing can go wrong. As if it's not possible that something beyond my control might affect the special day, I drive myself insane, striving to create a perfect gathering.

I'm wrong. My attempt to control everything does nothing but upset my life and my household. Approaching life in this manner completely circumvents God and His role. I'll admit that I've thought God would just go along with my plans and He'd assist me in making everything go smoothly. I'm blushing at this ridiculous thought.  I'm so sorry Father.

My life has recently spiraled out of control as we've learned that my infant grandson needs a heart transplant and we are currently waiting for a donor. He's in a very serious situation and it's really frightening for all of us.  I can't control any of it. I'm learning quickly that I need to learn to submit and rest in my Father's care. I need to stop scurrying and striving.  I need to be still and know that HE is God!

4 comments:

  1. Marci SmithOctober 14, 2012 at 10:56 PM

    I can completely relate. I am quite the control freak. I think this is why I worry. I want everything to go well. I know I am not in control of life, God is. God's ways are not always my ways. I tend to fight Him on this at times, especially if my children are involved. He is good and patient. He lets me throw my tantrum and always welcomes me with open arms. I love Him.

    I am praying my friend. You have not left my mind all day. I wish I were there to comfort you. I know, however, that the comfort Jesus provides is best. May you feel His loving presence. Love you.

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  2. Sra. NewcomerOctober 15, 2012 at 4:37 PM

    Thank you for sharing, and being so honest and open. I'll be praying for your grandson, his parents, and for you!

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  3. Sra. NewcomerOctober 15, 2012 at 4:37 PM

    Thank you for sharing, and being so honest and open. I'll be praying for your grandson, his parents, and for you!

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  4. PixieOctober 20, 2012 at 7:40 PM

    I get the same way at holidays and sometimes even on dates. I will pray that your grandson gets a donor. You seem like a wonderful person, maybe someday we can meet.

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